Prayer Poll

Ladies, please read my story then answer the poll questions:

God said "No."

by Saucy Sister

I was seventeen, and a senior in high school. I had an incredible GPA, but I had no clue of what to do after graduation. Dozens of colleges were calling. My parents had no money. I had no clue how scholarships worked and I didn't want student loans. I was totally paralyzed by indecision. So...I enrolled in the Army.

The recruiters called and just like that, I answered the call to serve my country. I don't even think I talked to my parents about it. The truth is, I was not particular patriotic, or athletic, but maybe, I figured, it would give me time to think about what I would do with my life. What a stupid way to make a decision!

Anyway, I was a horrible soldier from the beginning, which was no surprise. I wasn't lazy or without moral, just physically weak. My feet and legs just gave out. I couldn't run or march. I washed out in less than eight weeks, a medical discharge. The mind was willing, but the flesh was weak...literally.

When I got back home to VA, I felt like a failure. All the kids that I had competed with in high school were off to U of VA or Tech and I was working at Wendy's and as a part-time receptionist at a PR firm. I still had no idea what I would do.

I didn't understand what went wrong. I had really earnestly prayed that I would make it in the Army. Through tears in my bunk at night, with pain radiating from my feet to my knees, I prayed. On Sundays, during church meetings with the chaplain, I prayed. But, God allowed me to wash out.

I felt forsaken. how could God embarass me like this. How could he make me fail? How could I ever trust him?

For over a year, I didn't. I believed in God, but I didn't believe Him. My faith was only nominal. I still prayed, but it was very general prayers (i.e., bless me, bless mama, bless daddy.) I felt so disconnected from God, I was so lonely. I made a lot of reckless decisions during that time. But, He never gave up on me. He had a plan.

Fast forward to 2001. I was in college at Norfolk State University (which I resented very much). I was walking out of the bookstore, when I saw a congregation of students in the Student Union. Some were crying. I directed my eyes to the television screen, where we watched in awe a second plane crashing into the Twin Towers. I couldn't tell you what I was thinking.

In the days that followed, the US waged war against Afghanistan, and later Iraq. American soldiers were immediately deployed. And there was an urgent need for speakers of Arabic or Farsi to join the war effort.

Then I heard God remind me: When you were in the Army, you were to be trained as an Arabic speaking linquist. You would have been among the first sent into the crossfire. Possibly one of the first to lose your life.

I was suddenly humbled. For years, I had carried this grudge, this belief that God had somehow failed me. God said, "No." But his "no", was a "no" to destruction and war, "no" to being deployed for long periods from my loved ones, "no" to potential death. Sure there are Christians at war now, but He had other plans for my life.

God taught me a huge lesson, to trust Him, even when he says "No."

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Prayer Poll:

1. I feel that God has _______ in the past when I've exercised faith in Him.

• a. actively, affirmatively responded to me
• b. faithfully revealed himself to me, even if I didn't get what I asked
• c. rarely responded to me
• d. failed me

2. I _______ pray generic prayers, because I don't want to be disappointed by God.

• a. rarely
• b. occasionally
• c. often
• d. usually