Rejection and Forgiveness Part II

Recently, I was watching TLC and I saw a story about a 17 year old who was drag racing down in the Tampa Bay area, and smashed his car head on, into a van, carrying a mother and daughter. The husband of the victims was leaving home and saw the accident. He arrived on the scene in time to see that his wife and daughter were trapped in the vehicle. He also witnessed the resulting massive explosion of the van, right before his eye, which totally incinerated his beloved, while fireman and rescue workers stood helplessly by.

After grieving his tremendous loss, he got angry. He had discovered that his wife and daughter had been killed in an illegal drag race. He found the meanest, most expensive lawyer in Florida and went after the young man.

Near the end of the case, when the young man was clearly guilty and facing a lifetime in prison on two counts of negligent homicide, the father asked to do somethng unprecedented. He asked the judge if he could have an hour with the young man, alone in a room, without lawyers or cameras or any interference, as a part of the sentence.

The judge granted his request. The date was arranged. The timid young man joined the father in a closed room and for six minutes they sat in silence. Then the father took the lead and broke the silence, telling the young man about his lovely wife and daughter and how his life was ruin the day he watch them explode. The young man had no words, but burst into tears, in such pain at the loss he caused another man.

The older man, a father of sons, the same age as the young man sitting across from him, looked at this killer and thought...this could have been my son. His heart melted. There he decided to forgive the young man. He told the very broken young man, that he was forgiven. And even had the charges significantly reduced.

The young man never served a day in prison and today they work together, starting a foundation to end illegal street racing.

Wow! That was so powerful for me. And that's how forgiveness works. The victim must confront the victimizer and offer forgiveness. That's what God did for us. He confronts us with our sin, but then he offers us forgiveness and redemption through His Son. We never deserve it. Ask God to help you to forgive and be forgiven.

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March 6, 2007

Rejection and Forgiveness Part II
By Tracie Miles


1 Kings 8:50, “And forgive your people, who have sinned against you; forgive all the offenses they have committed against you, and cause their conquerors to show them mercy.” (NIV)

Devotion:

Yesterday’s devotion focused on how much rejection hurts, offered three truths for handling rejection, and provided some practical steps for being able to forgive those who have hurt us. It reminded us of our position in Christ and that we should not strive for the approval of man, but only the approval of God. The only problem is that is a lot easier said than done!

I want to give you a few more motivating factors to forgive those who have hurt you. The New Zealand Medical Journal published a letter from a clinician who did an analysis of 200 case histories showing that 60% of chronic pain patients exhibit a strong element of a failure to forgive. We tend to think of unforgiveness as an emotional issue, and not a health or medical issue. But it is critically important to realize that unforgiveness is a toxic emotion; it is like taking a deadly poison and expecting your enemy to die instead of you.

On the bright side, the benefits of forgiveness are endless. From an emotional perspective, forgiving others decreases anger, depression, and anxiety; it increases self esteem, self-control and our emotional stability; it strengthens relationships; and promotes peace. From a health perspective, the benefits of forgiveness include lowered blood pressure, improved immune systems, improved sleep, reduced stress, increased energy, improved sense of empowerment, reduced dysfunctional patterns of behavior, and an increased peace of mind.

Those people who have hurt us, rejected us, or made us feel unworthy may not deserve our forgiveness, but a key to possessing the ability to forgive is understanding that forgiveness is for us. When we truly forgive our debtors, our heart is filled with a peace that we never thought possible and our relationship with Christ can flourish and grow as we love and shower Him with our gratitude.

Living in a state of unforgiveness not only damages our emotional and physical health, but it also damages our spiritual-health???our relationship with Christ. Our spirits can either be filled with love, forgiveness, and peace; or with hatred and desires for vengeance against those who have hurt us. Although God will never forsake us and nothing we do can separate us from the love of God, our hearts can be overtaken with weeds of the enemy. We need to tend our “heart garden” with the love of Christ. Whichever spirit we fertilize the most is the spirit that will grow, controlling our minds and our actions.

We need to live for today, walking with God, finding joy in the little things, learning to laugh at our mistakes, being appreciative of the gifts God has given us, burying resentments, and most of all TRUSTING GOD. Trust that God has the power to help you forgive those who have hurt you. Trust that God will reward you for your faithfulness. Trust that God may want to use you to teach other people how to forgive, and that your forgiveness may be the key that unlocks the door for a non-believer’s eyes to see the Lord.



Dear Lord, help me know that with Your infused strength in me, I can forgive those who have hurt me. Please cleanse me of any desire for revenge, or any feelings of anger that I hold in my heart. Please fill my heart with Your peace and love and help me remember how precious I am in Your eyes. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.



Related Resources:

Traveling Together: Thoughts on Women, Friendship and the Journey of Faith by Karla Worley
Six Habits of Highly Effective Christians by Glynnis Whitwer and Brian T. Anderson


Application Steps:

In your journal, write down the names of people you may need to forgive. Pray for God to help you forgive the people who have hurt you.

Ask your family or friends if there is anything that you have unknowingly done that hurt them, and ask them for their forgiveness.



Reflections:

Is there anyone in my past or present that I need to forgive?

Do I harbor thoughts of revenge against someone who hurt me; should I pray for God to free my mind of unloving thoughts?

Do I need to ask God to help me with my feelings of rejection and pain, so that I can be free of the power that unforgiveness has on my heart?



Power Verses:

Ephesians 4:32, “Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.” (NIV)

1 Peter 3:8-9, “Finally, all of you, live in harmony with one another; be sympathetic, love as brothers, be compassionate and humble. Do not repay evil with evil or insult with insult, but with blessing, because to this you were called so that you may inherit a blessing.” (NIV)







Proverbs 31 Ministries

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